Feeding your Inner Child

Have you ever thought about you inner child.  That voice that screams, "This is not fair! Throw a fit!  Then you will get your way!"  Or complains, "But I WANT it!"  Or insists that it wants, "just one more bite."

My children are very open about what they what and when they want it.  Left to their own devices, I fear what would happen.  Scenes of explosions (not the emotional type), riotous living, partying, house trashed and complete sweet indulgence dance like sugar plum fairies in this mom's nightmare.

Fortunately moms and dads, grandmas and grandpas are around to help reign in the little terrors ANGELS.  But who parents the inner child of an adult?

I have recently found myself trapped in the "I am an adult, I can have another piece of cake if I want to" trap.  This insidious trap convinces me that as soon as the kids go to bed, I can indulge in something sweet or some mind-numbing tv because I deserve it!   You know the line....

"I've had a long day.  I have worked hard.  All children remained unscathed today and they all got to their lessons.  It's ME time!"  

And by the end of the evening I have eaten an entire carton of ice cream when I only intended to eat a single (or maybe double) scoop.

Would I ever let my child eat that way?  NEVER!  So why do I give in to my inner child's demands?  (A shrink might say it is because I was disciplined by a parent while growing up and never learned to self regulate and choose healthy habits on my own....)

Maybe for today, I'll eat like I would want my kids to. (Veggies FIRST!  No you may not have cookies & cocoa for breakfast!!!!)

Body Image Resources

27 Days to a Healthy Body Image: Day 18

As I have thought about my own food issues, I have found some great resources online.

I adore the fat nutritionist;  her site teaches about some of our common misconceptions about eating and some of the problems we have with eating because of a dieting culture.

I thought the concept of intuitive eating was brilliant. (And the book about it was co-authored by my favorite "Healthy Home-style Desserts" cookbook author Evelyn Tribole)  We can eat and enjoy and be happy  AND HEALTHY!!!

I also enjoyed the encouragement and hope found in the Healthy at Every Size (HAES).  National Geographic has a Fantastic article about the reasearch behind HAES. The results from this study took my breath away:

"What I find even more interesting is that research supports that people actually absorb more nutrients from meals that appeal to them than from meals they find less appetizing.

“In one interesting study, researchers fed a traditional Thai meal of rice and vegetables spiked with chili paste, fish sauce, and coconut cream to two groups of women, one Swedish and one Thai. The Thai women, who presumably liked the meal better than the Swedish women, absorbed 50 percent more iron from the same food than the Swedish women. And when the meal was blended together and turned to an unfamiliar and unpalatable paste, the Thai women’s absorption of iron from the meal decreased by 70 percent! So choking down the plate of steamed broccoli (if you hate steamed broccoli) is not likely to do you as much good as you think. Enjoying your food is an important nutritional practice."

Today, check out one or more of these articles and get a different perspective

Enjoying Enough

Here is where you can buy this book

I bought a book years ago.  It has been calling out to me, begging me to pick it up and read.  I read it years ago, loved it, loaned it out, put it back on the shelf and forgot about it.   I picked it up  yesterday.  It was just what I needed. A book we all should read.  Wanting More; the challenge of enjoyment in the Age of Addiction, by Mark Chamberlain

One of my biggest struggles with self esteem and food is the concept of "enough."  Am I good enough, bright enough, smart enough, athletic enough, skinny enough, accomplished enough?  Can I ever have enough cake, cookies, ICE CREAM (yeah I eat the whole carton myself sometimes), french cheese, or other delicious, divine food?

"One good-bye is never enough" (name that movie)

But "enough" is elusive, always evading me.  The first bite of ice cream is AMAZING, but the second never seems to as good; so I eat another and another and  another bite trying to recapture the enjoyment of that first moment.

Success is the same way for me.  I loose 5 lbs and I am proud of myself, but a nagging feeling returns saying more, more, more.  If some is good more is better.  I can run a marathon, why not an Ironman, or ultras or [fill in the blank]?

It is our "natural man"  appetite that craves and is never satiated; hungers and is every thirsty; desires and is never satisfied.   I just need a bigger house, to loose 10 more pounds, to eat one more cookie, to get this job promotion-- then I will be happy/satisfied/content.  But satisfied/content/happy never really happens.  We (I) still want more.  It is a trap that we (I) never really recognize in the moment. This longing for more can help us become better, more productive people, but it becomes a trap when we allow our appetite to control, lead and direct our lives.

Let's pause for an awesome quote segment:

The world lacks and hankers, and is enslaved to thirst.
-- Buddha

He who knows not when he has enough is poor.
-- Japaneese Proverb

Nothing is enough for the man to whom enough is too little.
-- Epicurus

Enough is as good as a feast.
-- Mary Poppins

 Mark Chamberlain describes the cycle of addiction.  We begin with normal sized appetites/desires/cravings.  When we indulge in said appetites/desires/cravings we get immediate gratification.  Immediate gratification leads to dissatisfation and subsequently larger appetites/desires/cravings, creating a downward spiral of needing more and more to feel satisfied/content/happy.  (Think alcohol/drug abuse but with food, money, and success.)

On the up side, Mr. Chamberlain says there is a way to thwart the cycle of addiction.  The key?  Working and waiting.  Working/Waiting lead to deprivation.  Deprevation leads to increased sensitivity.  Increased sensitivity helps us feel satisfied/content/happy with less, thereby making our appetites/desires/cravings shrink.  Over time, if we have not damaged our bodies to the point that they can not repair themselves, our appetites will return to "sub-standard" size.

I have seen this cycle in myself.  Living in France for a couple of months with only a bath and no shower deprived me of a seemingly normal luxury.  When I returned home, I thoroughly enjoyed the luxury of standing up to wash and having water cascade from overhead.  Now a bath is a luxury!

The key then is to increase our sensitiviy to our blessings.  Bring on the second awesome quote segment:

"Let us remain as empty as possible, so that God can fill us up."
-- Mother Theresa

"You're body is precious.  It is your vehicle for awakening.  Treat it with care."
-- Buddha

"I have learned to seek my happiness by limiting my desires, rather than in attempting to satisfy them."
-- John Stuart Mill

 Chamberlain noted a study where college students were given yogurt to eat with their favorite T.V. show and were asked to report their enjoyment factor.  One group had plain yogurt and the other group got to pick their favorite flavor to eat.  At the beginnning of the experiment the gruop with the flavored yogurt ranked their enjoyment higher than the plain yogurt group.  But as the days and weeks passed, the flavored yogurt group became less and less content.  On the other hand, as the plain yogurt group adapted to the experience they found more and more enjoyment and actually surpassed the enjoyment rating the flavored yogurt eaters had at the beginning of the experiment.

The lesson:  Eat plain yogurt?  Maybe...  How about giving less a try.  Less sugar in your oatmeal.  Fewer chocolate chips in that cookie.  Fewer nights eating out.  Wait longer before you indulge in that cheesecake.  Savor and enjoy one bite.  Then put it away.  (The hardest part for me.)

Plan ahead:  learn your triggers (stress, hunger, not eating enough healthy food, temptation).  We can do this.  It will be a battle.  We are fighting our own nature, but with God's grace we can LOVE LESS!

Today, Enjoy Enough!

Food Issues & Addictions

27 Days to a Healthy Body Image: Day 14

Hi.  My name is Erica.  I am a food addict.  Hello Erica, you say.  Yes this is my Food Addict Anonymous Post.  If you have been reading for a while you know my addiction well.  Not just any food will do.  I need the good stuff-- and a lot of it.  I have modified recipes and used different techniques for minimizing scarfing, but here I am again facing my demon.  I have to learn to control the addiction.

My goal for this week is to post different techniques used to change attitudes and habits.  Maybe together we can find something that will help.  I know when my addiction is under control, I feel better about my body and myself.  Is my food addiction getting in the way of a positive body image?  Probably.  Let's work on that.

A year ago I posted about Fixing Food addictions (read more about that here).  I wanted to change a bad habit.  My worst habit: eating on the go.  So I tried to make sure that anytime anything went into my mouth, I was sitting down, enjoying the food.  Yeah, I have let that habit go.  But the jist of is was important.  Eat with intention.

I see it at workouts, I see it in my kids school work.  When we just go through the motions, we don't get much out of it.  You want a real workout, then work.  Make each movement count.  You want good grades; focus on the work.  Gillain says, "don't phone this in!"  Make your work actually count for something.

Can I eat with intention?  Can I eat with a purpose and a focus (besides gluttony)?  What if we looked at food as "nutrition," an essential part of caring for our bodies.  Over-watering and over-fertilizing kills plants; "over-fooding" kills people.  Can I eat just enough to feed my body, and feed it well?

Today, think before you eat.  Is this good for my body?  Will my body function better for having put this in my mouth?  Does this supply adequate nutrition?  Judge your food by this standard, then allow yourself to enjoy it!

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